Sticky stilettos

I hope you’ll all appreciate the lengths of research effort I went to, to write this post*: it has taken up considerable hours of my time, both in doing the research and then thinking about it for a good deal afterwards.

See, a few weeks back a colleague told me he/she [let’s keep them extra-anonymous for safety] had seen my new shoes in a porn movie. I was consumed with glee, the same glee that once gave me a week-long high after spotting another pair of my shoes gracing local shleb Noni Gasa’s feet in Heat magazine – in the ‘This Week’s Best Dressed’ pages, not the ‘What Was She Thinking’ pages, I’ll have you know.

Naturally, I had to see the porno myself to verify that my shoes were in fact part of the accessories to the plot. Trouble was, my colleague couldn’t remember in which of the episodes of the porn series (www.vipcrew.com – great stuff) he/she had spotted my gorgeous heels. So I forced myself to wade through hours of arousing material to find them (particularly frustrating when you don’t have a living person there to relieve yourself with). You also tend to get a little side-tracked from your shoe-hunting mission when Andy’s doing Mandy from behind while Jessica is simultaneously nipple-fucking Kim (yes, I did learn something new) and plunging a dildo into Michelle’s cavernous vagina (“Yes Michelle, you like that don’t you, dirty bitch. Spread that ass for me.”)

I kept getting absorbed in the task of determining who had, and hadn’t, had anal bleaching (answer: about 4 out of 5 had, by my estimation), so a substantial amount of back-tracking was necessary, too.

I eventually found the shoes I suspect he/she thought I owned, but my heels are obviously not the type to clad the feet of those climaxing for a living. Pity, that. They’re rather fantastic if I do say so myself.

Anyhow, the pics are below – I’d ask you to guess which shoe’s mine and which one’s the skank-ho’s (is that the right application of the term, Peas?) – but the plate in the mirror reflection kind of gives it away, it was right in the middle of the standard pound-my-pussy-hard-against-the-cupboard-door-after-hors-d’oeuvres scene.

Exhibit A



Exhibit B

*may make this blog worthy of a nomination in the ‘Best Researched Blog’ category… No? Ok, at least I tried